GOOD Advice...

Advice given to me from my friend PB....GOOD advice!!

"This might sound overly simplistic, but the success of a long-term relationship has everything to do with how much fun you have together. Do you laugh together? Do you ask how his/her day went? Are you genuinely interested in one another? It's easy to get into a habit of overlooking common courtesies, but the more goodwill you establish, especially over time, the better. This might all sound like common sense, but there are plenty of couples who DON'T care about their partner's day and who neglect to listen to one another. Play. Have fun. Do it like the relationship depends on it. And never, ever forget the importance of kindness.  

This sense of goodwill and loving atmosphere will make it easier for a couple to broach touchy subjects. If you have a bond of trust, you inherently know your partner's intentions, thereby decreasing the need for defensiveness (remember, the latter was one of the signs for trouble). For instance, comments from others that might make your bristle might not necessarily mean World War III with your partner because there is no ill will. When you foster a pattern of consistency, safety, and stability, you simultaneously create a sense of "we're in this together." And that's exactly where you want to be.  

Be quick to forgive and quicker to apologize. After all, this is not a competition. You ARE on the same side, and let's face it, if one person isn't happy, the other probably isn't either. I'm not trying to use all cliches here, but you know  in your heart it's not about keeping score. So what if he occasionally forgets to do something you asked or if she did not do a task to your standards? If you keep track of all the little things, eventually they will turn into insurmountable walls based on...well, a whole lot of nothing.  

The point is, sometimes we have to just let things go. How do you know the difference? In the midst of an argument, or better yet, BEFORE one begins, ask yourself if the issue will matter in five weeks, five months, or five years. It should allow you to put things in perspective so you can get back to the important things like loving each other...and making out under the mistletoe."